29 November 2006

I am not sure if you all have noticed but BIG BAGS ARE IN. I guess designers finally realized we can not fit all our "must haves" in a Kate Spade clutch. Some are a bit too big for my taste, but out of all the bags I have seen, these are my favorites:

Ananas Bags @ A Mano (1115 First Ave (Cross Street: Spring Street)
Seattle, WA 98101; (206) 292-1767)

They have this sort of fantastic Shapeless Shape. Ananas bags are fantastic. You can snag a bag for yourself @ A Mano on First. I have to admit, I have never been there, but plan to rub elbows with all their "delicately handpicked" merchandise on the 7th to celebrate the Holidays. If you get there before I do, please, save me a bag!
(these lovely bags found by: fashionisspinach.com)

27 November 2006

The other day I cleaned my closet. A feat I wouldn't wish upon my least favorite Fashion Editor. The process was hard, but the emotional distress was even harder. Because underneath the clean sass and style I am this girl whose sheets are not clean whose bank account is awry whose hand bag is messy. I think all to much about what you think of me and a handful of years ago, I'd give anything for you not to know that. And, its not until the last few months that I realized I am ready to be the a better version of that girl. And to do so, I went through every piece of clothing that I owned - and every sweater and shirt and necklace and shoe that I tossed is a little bit of that person who was too fearful of herself to simply be herself.

And in getting rid of all these things that I once thought made me me was more difficult than anything I've had to do as of late - because going back and remembering how sad it was to not be able to be me seemed like years wasted, friendships underdeveloped, and relationships lost all because I couldn't tell the truth about me. It felt as though I owed every person I came into contact with an apology for my willful insincerity.

And I realized that underneath the piles and piles and piles of things that really mean very little were hidden challenges I am now, just now, ready to face. Like real life friendship; truth and commitment in and to important things like work and family and relationships; Like The Balance.

It’s a balance I have always understood and been able to wear with any color and in any season. But now, that life holds a bit more than mid terms and first dates and the need for gas money – the balance I have always been able to tip toe across, is tripping me up left and right and in learning which way to move my weight in order to keep it all in line, I have bruises. Soft little patches of reminders that I am (finally) a very real version of myself.
Snow! Snow means its time for boots (YEAH) and I don't mean boots with a come hither heal
and amazingly pointy toe, but real life "keep your feet warm and dry and in one piece" boots.
Growing up my mom referred to these as galoshes, now they are know around College Campuses at "wellies" call them what you will, but do me a favor and don't spend over 25.00 for a pair. All wellies are created equal with Glue and Rubber no need to spend an arm and a leg - I got mine at TARGET for a cool 19.99. Here are few of my favorites:

Happy Stomping Kids!

26 November 2006

I've been a bit absent from here. I'd like to admit that I have been up to all sorts of mischief involving clothes and vodka and sleepless nights. I'd like to admit that I have been elbow deep in love and hand holding and secret telling over chai tea and ciggies. What I have been doing is not holding up my end of the bargain I have made with myself. And for that, I am wearing a lumpy crown of disappointment. And instead of taking my hands and removing the visible yuck I have been playing catch up with all sorts of other things only to avoid the inevitable.

What I have been doing is working very hard to discover the person living underneath my skin. I've been chatting with the girl who I walk and think and dream with everyday. Using one syllable at time to find out when it is she'll be ready to take the lead. She's the girl who never is without words and leaves all her worry underneath her pillow and in the depths of her hand bag. She's the girl who does as she says. She's the girl who doesn't loose her wallet or her confidence. She's the girl who can keep track of your Birthday and her emotions. I can't wait for you all to meet her.

25 November 2006

Over the past couple of hours there have been a handful of moments which have left me floating a little above my normal high. In my efforts to never forget I have been devising a plan as to how to keep all of the keepable moments in the very front of my memory. I am a bit too old for tattooing and not quite old enough to cross stitch. For now, I have decided to paste these moments on the insides of my eye lids. I've made a promise to take more time to blink.

I hope that your Thanksgiving was bound by family and full bellies and you were swarmed by all that you are thankful for. The older I get, the more I realize that the little things are what I am most thankful for. Like how my giggle bounces off yours and the way we hold hands when we mean it and the lovely truth that I have all the people I ever need to know folded in my back pocket.

If your in my neighborhood, I'd recommend stopping here for a bite to eat:

Madison Park Cafe (1807 42nd Ave E Seattle, WA 98112 (206) 324-2626)

We had home made granola, yogurt, and a tower of toast. Some say the wait is long - we had no problem at all. Our waitress recognized my dater and I from out last meal at Palomino which lead to a conversation as to who had the most memorable face. He wins, hands down. Oh, and, if you do have a long wait - you can stop by my place for some giggles, a game of fetch, and a mimosa.

20 November 2006

So you have an idea of how uncool my recent shopping has been.

Antique Black Backless Stool @ Target ( 17700 NE 76th St , Redmond, WA 98052Phone: (425) 556-9533); $99.00 for both.

Actually these are not that un cool, just not all that exciting to report. You can't take them out and show them off. So if you'd like to take a look at them, you'll have to stop by my new place, which you are always welcome to do. I'll be baking pumpkin bread and tying packages with organza ribbon and raffia. You may sit on these wile I skip around and be domestic.

I have been a painstakingly boring girl who has spent the past two weeks packing and unpacking and packing again; figuring out love and which drapes go best with my couch.

I have had little time for bar hopping or shopping or a anything cool. I am out of practice.

This week I promise to drudge up some cool new things for the both of us, because honestly, I feel like I am 26 going on 86, except I don't know how to knit.

18 November 2006

(exactly one year ago today- from the archives)

fairy tale
Yesterday, Alyssa and I took on the Ballet. We have had PNB season tickets since she was 4. Every time we go we hold hands, she falls asleep, and we both carry each other’s secret dream of becoming a ballerina to the coffee shop and talk about the performance...
The rest of my afternoon was laced with sleepiness and drama. Both of which I have let go of.
Saturday was my sister’s wedding reception. It was as to be expected. My date (Auntie Judy) was disappointingly well behaved and I went home alone without a buzz and a full belly.
Saturday night I met Jenny, Lexi's friend. Jenny is the kind of girl I would like to be. She wears no make-up and dates a boy in a band. She likes tequila and green tea. We swapped boyfriend horror stories at Linda's before we moved onto the War Room. We were standing by the juke box, scoping out a rare bird in the corner, when an adorable boy let us know he was leaving. We followed him to the table and the rest of his equally adorable crew introduced themselves: Peter, Paul, Johnah, and John. We giggled at their holy names...
Once upon a time I was a girl with strong convictions, boundaries, goals, and spirit. On occasion, that girl will waltz back into my life and make some pretty big decisions. I ask her to stay around for as long as she can. I romance her with nights on the couch and days spent with family; hikes and reading; sewing and running. Currently, she is visiting. Tonight I plan on making a permanent space for her in my room and moving a few of my clothes out of the way so she can feel at home.

17 November 2006

All of my shoes have a warn spot on the outer right heal where my foot rests while I drive. I have made a habit of removing my right shoe so there will be no physical evidence of the fact that I can't seem to slow down.

Today,I'd like to open that box I hid under by bed - I am in a real life need of goodness.

Last night my best friend found herself on a VIP tour bus from LA to San Diego. The fog was too thick to land in San Diego, so she and a few of the other passengers, bound together and requested the bus to drop them at various locations throughout Southern California. If you live in LA and were awoken by a tour bus hydraulics some point in the wee hours last night - she apologises. But don't be too upset, she was on her way to find some love, and really? How can you begrudge a girl for that? It seems like some people have all the fun.

15 November 2006

Once upon a time when I was a girl who had it all figured out I let my love swarm above my head - loose leaf flurries of loveliness. I was careless and let them float away without knowing where or who they were going to.

now-a-days I pin it to my fingertips and let is rest in my shoes - so when I shake a strangers hand or hop over a puddle you can tell that I am a girl with real life love in her life who wants nothing more than to share it with you, because it is that good.

Today was one of those days I would package up in a plain old box and hide under my bed, so when a day rolls around when I have forgotten that life really is this lovely - the past 24 moments will pop out and remind of how good it really is.

14 November 2006

Yesterday evening I locked myself in my apartment. I left my keys in the door and turned the dead bolt on the inside, which left me stuck in, instead of out. In less than a few moments I realized I would much rather be out than in. Which is funny, because almost all of my adolescence was spent charming my way in - if I had known a few years down the road out felt much more comfortable than in, I would've spent that time memorizing show tunes and weather patterns.

The 25 for 25 is happening. If you (like me ) have yet to take advantage, shame shame shame on you. I am breaking the pattern today - I have a lunch date with Andaluca. I have been here once (Prom 1997) when it was over on Dexter Avenue, high above the filth, overlooking the water. I can imagine has it the venue, menu and the restaurant all together is completely different. *

407 Olive Way, Seattle, (in the Mayflower Hotel) (206).382.6999
I have plans to start with the lamb, then nosh on some beets and apples and risotto, and finish with the saffron cheese cake.
*-Hey, did I mention I was a total pot head in high school? Adriatica is the restaurant I was thinking of, not Andaluca. Andaluca will be an entirely new experience.

13 November 2006

For some reason, today, I am without words, which scares me more than The Worry. Because even when The Worry consumes me I at least have words. Today, I am without both.

I spent yesterday evening alone, with out any noise thumbing through old college work and love letters and doodles of bouquets and hand bags. I stumbled upon lost giggles and soft touches that have been lurking in the shadows of my storage unit for quite some time.

I read most of the novellic thoughts out loud only because I couldn't quite hear the girl who had written and doodled and thought all these vowels and consonants and punctuation. And as we read together this girl and I, there was a Socratic understanding that she is I and together that makes we - And finally when we understood that one was the other we held hands and danced to That's Amore like we had known one another since 1,000 yesterdays.

For the time being I am switching all forms of communication to hand gestures and and toe taps.

10 November 2006

things I know as of just about now...

Ikea is the best thing since Tom Ford went to Gucci.
My mom is right, kmart is not that bad.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Only very special people meant lift heavy objects

For the first time in something like forever, I have plates, cups, sheets, and all sorts of other adult things which will reside in my own apartment with just me and my thoughts and my puppy.

09 November 2006

My favorite thing to talk about this week is the weather. It's rainy. Seriously rainy. An "Urban Flood Watch" has been noted by local news. I explained to a friend in NYC that Seattle is like a swimming pool, without the hot lifeguard, sun or chlorine. funny? no?

Either way, I am keeping dry by staying in - however when I do venture from my car to my front door, I am wearing my new Scoodie.

Kasil knit Scoodie; $40; @ Kulhmans ( 2419 1st Ave; Seattle, WA 98121 ; 206-441-1999)

I wish the name wasn't so cheesy as it renders itself a spot on QVC. Luckily it is available at Kulhmans and you don't have to stay up to the wee hours in front of the TV to get one.

I called today to see if KULHMANS has them in stock - rest assured they are on the way (maybe you people are one step ahead of me). Scott is giving me a jingle when they arrive, I'll be sure to let you all know when the the Scoodies are in town.

After you get your Scoodie - thumb through the Ella Moss, Ben Sherman, Merc, Fred Perry and casually tailored comfey's. And if you EVER NEED TAILORING GO TO KUHLMANS (yes that was a shout). Scott is the best Tailor I have ever been to, a modern day miracle worker armed with silk thread and a 1pt needle.

08 November 2006

Seattle. Please stand. raise your right hand. GIVE YOURSELF A NICE BIG PAT ON THE BACK. You did good and made right.

Washington is in for another term of spectacular senate-ship. Congratulations Senator Cantwell. Cheers to loving our kids and their education, the environment and making sure we are all well taken care of. Thank you for standing up for (almost) everything I believe in. Check out what her plan is here: http://www.cantwell.com/issues/

And a high five to McGavick for running a clean and fare race. this year was without scandal or slander and really made politics (dare I say) fun.

I am glad we left the controversy to the South.

I'd also like to point out, our state is female heavy. Don't know about you, but I think that is pretty darn rad.

Thanks for being super smart Washington.

07 November 2006

We spent all these years creating secrets so that when we were older we'd be able to sit together, hand and hand, glass to glass and re learn the lessons. And now that we are standing right side up without much askew - we can learn from all the things we kept at arms length for all those years. Now we lean heavy into the secrets cheerfully armed with numbers and names and (a tiny bit) of shame - they are finally able to hold the weight of our friendship without even so much as a give.

I am fairly certain, years from now when the oldest secrets have harvested we'll be glass to glass musing over the colors, scent and arrangement of this inexplicable yet lovely bouquet.

06 November 2006

It's when you least expect it the loveliest of things sneak up behind you. And the more I grow up the more I learn that usually the loveliest of things bare scary masks. It takes some conversation and a pat on the back to get the lovely to remove whatever layer it feels most comfortable in. And when they do? Fantastic things happen like real love and true friendship and undeniable trust.

I am still decompressing from THREAD. I can say this - Cool People, Cool Threads, Cool Shit all around. I hope you were able to make it!

My weekend ended with a real life girl slumber party and I couldn't have asked for anything more perfect.

04 November 2006

MASH - Mansion Apartment Shack or House.

I had no idea little girls still told their future using wide rule note book paper and chance. Lucky for me I get marry my Best Friend, Live in a mansion, be a rock star and have 5 kids which I will be toting around in my Toyota Prius. The new category for today's youth (which I am quite proud to announce) is Clothing. You get to decide what clothes you will wear for the rest of your life. Amongst Prada, Martha Stewart for K-mart, Marc Jacobs and Old Navy - I get to dawn Sr. Jacobs for eternity. So that means Marc has all of 0 months to sketch up children's line, b/c according to MASH, I should've poped out the first of my penta-team yesterday.

From the words of the 10 year old who etched my future, one cross-out at time, as she discovered that indeed I Really Would be a Rockstar "that is so awesome".

Enjoy your MARCtastic Saturday kids.

I think this is pretty "awesome"

Marc by Marc Jacobs Viola Sweater; $358.00; Nordstrom Pacific Place

Nordstrom Savvy
(500 Pine Street Seattle, WA 98101-1744 (206) 628-2111)

03 November 2006

I've been linked!
Yeah Yeah, No big deal to all of you who are old hat at this. But for me? It's like falling upon a sale at Barney's and EVERYTHING is in your size and they are serving smoked gouda bruschetta with Pinot Noir, you are in love, all of your best girlfriends are there and you just found out you never have to pay rent again.

yeah, so, kind of exciting for me.

Thanks http://www.westseattleblog.com/. If I new how to do that nifty link thing, I would. And, yes indeed, they are $212.00.

Still so much to learn...
H&M gets Viktor and Rolf; Target gets Proenza Schouler.

ummmm.... H&M 1: Target 1,000,000

Despite the fact that there is no H&M with in shouting distance from here, I would still rather have Proenza Schouler over Viktor and Rolf, I think...

There a SEVERAL Target Stores in our area. My favorite is the new store @ Northgate (302 NE Northgate Way, Seattle, WA 98125, (206) 494-0897). The other Jem - Redmond (17700 NE 76th St, Redmond, WA 98052, (425) 556-9533)

It's Friday. This evening I will be braiding hair and singing john Jacob Jingkleheimer Schmidt with a 4 year old and catching up on the devastatingly dramatic life of a 5th grader. The rest of the weekend I will be swooning over my dater, my puppy and new designers (I'd love to see ALL your pretty pretty faces at THREAD - go here for cheep admission www.threadshow.com/seattle).

02 November 2006

This little fuzzy + Opaque Tights = My Holiday outfit
(Velvet BabyDoll Dress from Anthropolgie; $225.00; 1513 5th Ave, Seattle, WA 98101 (206) 381-5900)

This sort of reminds me of my Freshman Year Homecoming dress. It was cute then, and is cute now! Thank Heavens for the BabyDoll.
The Worry has completely consumed me.

there is a chance I will be passing paper notes folded into bow ties or swans. If you get one, please read carefully and answer as you will. In these sort of situations, it is always best to go with your first instinct - or so I've been told. No need to fold it back into something creative just shove it in my locker and we'll get this whole thing over with.

FYI to all of you. When the worry warts its way into my heart, head, and all over my insides, I like to make lite by pretending things like martini's, red vines and denim can make it go away.

This time around we will use my dress up box and storyline. Next time, we can totally use yours.

Here: you try these on and pretend you can afford them (maybe you can, lucky duck) while I have a chat with The Worry and remind it that sure footed semi popular Seattle girls do not have time for Worry.

People's Liberation Denim, $212.00 + @ Sweetie in West Seattle
(I wear mine* to work. They have sophisticated stitching and a finely tailored leg and the adornment on the butt makes you feel like you have not gone totally corporate.)

My Favorite place to get them is Sweetie in West Seattle. Go for the Denim and the Rocker T's and totally unique jewelry.

4508 California Ave S.W.
Seattle, WA 98116
Phone: 206-923-3533

*Both pairs I own have been purchased on sale, thankyourverymuch.

01 November 2006

Soon to mulitply like bunnies - The first of the Velvet(tines)

APC Blue Velvet Blazer 336.00 @ IMPULSE Seattle

Impulse Seattle is in Fremont.
3516 Fremont Place North, Seattle Washington, 98103
Jill is the owner. Here is her Blog: http://impulseseattle.blogspot.com/

This is possibly one of my most favorite stores in the entire world (I have seen a bit of the world, so that is not a totally outlandish statement). I have wanted to be her since the day I met her, but I will settle for shopping in her store and celebrating her fantastic taste. Jill and her Store and her "People" are rad in 100 different ways. Please go in and say hello and buy stuff.

I am saving up for this (no joke, my heart literally skipped a beat when I saw this):

and the back

Mayle Jumper Black 504.00 @ IMPULSE Seattle

eeeeeeeek. I love this.
Dear October,

Like a lot of things lately I am feeling middle of the road, not so much here not so much there about not so much of anything - you included. Some of September's struggles stumbled into our first few days together and blurred the lines between really shitty and sort-of shitty and eventually faded into plain old okay.

You did however en capture one of the loveliest days in my life thus far. A wedding between two people who epitomize love and for that I am forever grateful. Maybe this is a sign of turn around for you and I.

I can say you did a fantastic job redeeming yourself from the years past. You were completely devoid of break-ups and tears and lost friendships. Thanks for that. My heart is wearing a bit and I am not sure I would have been able to handle all of the above.

You required me to do a lot of thinking. Thinking about me and others and how we all work together to be better while doing our darnedest to be ourselves. And in sitting on bar stools or in coffee shops or across dinner tables I learned I am not the only one who requires the constellations for company and consult durining the wee hours of the night. And don't think this is a misery loves company sort of thing. If anything? You and all the others have taught me to be grateful for the tiniest of tinest of things. Becasue from there we can only build.

You, October, were what one might call a tiny-tiny pleasant surprise. Thank you.

High Fives and Butt Shakes,



To be honest and boring I will have to say, i am sticking with the Jacobs Ladder approach. I will let you unfold the way you'd like and we'll work together to plant something specular for the end of the year. Maybe a band of tip-toeing Manolo Blahnik Mary Jane's or hours upon hours of laughing and drinking and love. What ever it is - I am pretty excited to work on it together - a minute at a time - and watch our garden grow.

I do have one request, November. Please keep the love coming - things are brighter and seem a whole lot easier when love is in the mix.

Oh, almost forgot - there are all sorts of things to be done and growing up to do and decisions to be made - so don't think I won't be doing some, because that girl that was around earlier this year is hiding behind the current (stronger and nicer) version of herself.

Sure steps and turtle necks,