Hello, my name is Amanda, I am a girl who talks with her hands, loves, and is terribly clumsy. I believe in hand holding, positive thinking, and second chances. I like soy milk and firm hugs; early morning runs and simplicity. It's nice to meet you...
There were some unexpected and lovely things that happened over the year, like falling in "real-life-I can’t-live my life without you" love and learning to be an adult. Naked swimming and late night dancing. Real life grown up things like car problems and bills and big time decisions that made a big time difference.
I have spent the better half of this year focused on love. Learning to love me and you and making a point to unfold you in every way possible so that you can see all the lovely things I see in you. 2006, you have helped me learn that it is my job, here on earth as a person to make sure you make it. That you get to the spot where nothing is impossible. Why? Because I know you can do it and all it takes is some focus. I see it, and I want more than anything for you too see it too.
You left me without too many scars, and it's just the marks from the years past that are still apparent. And now, just now I have realized how to help heal some of the scars. And it's not (entirely) through giggles or bubbly or hand holding, but comes from the deepest part inside me.
I wrote down almost every moment I had this year - Good, bad, laughable, tear worthy, and inappropriate. And in doing so, I realized that writing is my forum for clarity, truth, and insight. I am my very best self when I am translating my thoughts into words, and an even better self knowing there is someone out there reading them. I have learned that with out The Words, I am without the most fantastic part of myself.
This past year, I spent a lot of time piecing together metaphors; relating certain feelings to certain objects contrary to what they really are. I did my very best to make sure that reality was wearing a lovely mask of Chanel lip gloss and lace; speaking in foreign tongues and perpetually cheerful. My apologies reality - I owe you one. With the onset of 2007, I have tripped willfully into myself and accepted that things are just as they seem. I have come to understand that I know the Answers I just have to let myself believe them.
What I have realized is that one thing leads to another. But it is up to me to create that one thing and to seek out the other. I can not control fate, but I certainly can help mold my destiny. There are a few things that are a musts for this upcoming year - included are: love, kissing, and dancing; blogging, reading and running; foreign countries and regular pedicures. Quality time with my dater and my puppy; honest words amongst friends, colleagues and family members; and a complete dedicaton to becoming a woman of substance and knowledge, a person people want to be around.
I have grand expectations for 2007. I’d like to see a bit more of this world and have a few more conversations in languages I don’t quite understand. I’d like to help heal a few more hearts and make sure we are all shopping and eating and drinking and experiencing the BEST this city has to offer. I'd love for you all to join me on my adventure, because honestly, I know this is going to be to best year of my life. And together, through laughs and martinis and swapping stories we can make it the best year of your life too.
Welcome 2007, I am totally excited you are here.
ps- I wrote this
several yesterday's ago. I didn't revisit these words until yesterday. I had no idea I had actually kept my promises. Some times I really surprise myslef.